Broken Window

Last weekend’s weather was pretty damp… I spent my Friday night intoxicated in red wine, went home after dinner and watched endless episodes of L word, next thing I know it was getting bright already and my head was pulsating like hell cuz of the wine the other night. I looked outside and I couldn’t remember the last time I loved the city rain but that moment I just wanted to jump from my window and be blown away by the cool wind and droplets of rain. Exactly 7 am I ran outside on the empty street of my apartment and just enjoyed the cool dampness of the world around me, if it wasn’t for the stupid stench of the passing garbage truck I wouldn’t have come back up to my room, what a bummer, not to mention the flying debris from the construction in front of my place. Talk about having a ruined nostalgic cinematic moment out in the rain when all of a sudden reality draws you back… damp, lifeless, and smelly.

I’m really not fond of rainy season; everything’s so gloomy and wet. I’m more of a summer person, always an excuse to leave the coat just hanging by the closet. I hate getting stuck outside hailing a taxi out on a storm, and getting soaked in your favorite clothes. But who doesn’t love the rain when they announce that all classes and offices are suspended. My ex use to love the rain dripping on the roof, it sends her memories back from Vancouver I guess where she spent days wandering by the rain. I guess maybe that’s also a reason why I’m not fond of the rain, cuz it sends such sad memories. It scares me waking up in the middle of the night when no one’s around and all I can hear is the rain outdoors. There’s something about the rain that’s so depressing. But with my love for beauty of sadness I love seeing it in movies and reading about lonely rainy scenes in novels, it’s just so different when living it.

This weekend I enjoyed the weather though, I could think of hundred sceneries with the wind billowing on my skin…a little boy walking by the rain clutching his coat…someone crying silently on the street while the wind catches her sleeve…a woman sitting by the porch listening to sad songs with the droplets of rain in the background…someone standing outside the beach house with eyes wandering off the dark sky…a couple leaving each other under the gray sky…and me with nothing better to do sitting by the window feeling the coldness and beauty of it all…